The Pandemic Blues

This time of year people say is joyful,

But this year it’s the anniversary of the worst time of my life,

Everyone is excited and bouncing with joy,

But inside me the grief is pulling me down,

While everyone is bouncing about town.

My life nearly ended to a bird flu in those happy times,

Now in a pandemic I sit with no immune system,

Stressing about what might come my way,

With covid and flu running rampant around me,

My castle, my fort nothing allowed in.

I watch my friend go heroic things everyday,

I watch as what we ask of them to do and who to save,

They achieve more than we should ask of anyone,

I am in such awe of these humans who call me friends,

Do all that’s asked and get through all the strife,

I would entrust each and everyone of them with my life.

Every bleep and noise sends me back to ICU,

Back struggling for breath, drowning in fluid,

Those flashes of trauma burned into my brain,

Lessen with time but never going away,

I send every so often and relive my pain,

So others won’t have to live my pain again.

I stand up at conferences and tell you my tale,

But my suffering a footnote in the effect it had taken,

Every single day my family’s hearts where breaking,

I was fighting with every ounce of my being,

But me laying lifeless all they where seeing.

So this time of year for me not filled with joy,

Even the thought of getting new ‘toys’,

But I am happy I am here and my friends still are too,

If we all stand together we will all get through,

Supporting each other holding each other up,

At the end of it all we will all have a cup’.

Life

Life ain't a cruise, sitting in the sun,

Life ain't a smooth ride and fun,

Life ain't fair to me or you,

Life ain't to be walked alone,

Life ain't a quest you can complete.

Time is not everlasting its finite,

At the end of our journey, we all have to alight,

Every step we take leaves a mark on those around us,

Then in a moment, we will be soundless.

We give more energy to those who harm us,

Than those who love us, those we cherish,

 Sometimes in our lives, we have to be selfish,

Put ourselves first cease selling,

That which makes us unique.

Life ain't always filled with Blues,

Life ain't always feeling under the gun,

Life ain't always about what your due,

Life ain't always about that ringing phone,

Life ain't always about taking a back seat.

Sometimes we just have to love,

Sometimes we just have to leave,

Sometimes we just have to believe,

Sometimes we just have to scream,

Sometimes we have to trust.

Omicron

 Oh you should never touch your face,

Might be time to wash those hands,

Inside you need flowing air,

Currently maybe just keep some space,

Rethink about if you can work from home?

Or maybe not go into those crowded spaces?

Now is time for masks again.

Can we try and stop the spread,

Outlast this virus as a whole,

Victory will come if we all behave,

I would love to go outside and enjoy life

Don't mess it up this time.

Thinking of you

 Sometimes all I think about is you,

Sitting here in the middle of the night,

I remember every single fight,

I remember having to pay my due,

I mourn everything you took from me.

I can't fight you but you will never leave,

No matter how strong I am you come in the dark,

Hit like a flash as I sit in the park,

You leave me unable to believe,

Breaking down my reality.

You're not pleasant and I am left confused,

I listen detached to the diagnosis bemused,

My body is a testament to your victories,

Your causes are often left to mysteries,

My Scars are proof of my wins.

Some times all I can think about is you,

Thinking of the suffering you have brought,

Leaving me to pick up the pieces and rebuild,

But each battle a lesson taught,

The Old me you have killed.

But I brushed myself off got to my feet,

Standing up after every single defeat,

I know you will win in the end,

I won't go quietly into that night, 

With every breath and fibre of my soul, I'll Fight.

Your Workplace is my Prison

 You come to work got a lot to do,

Lots of paperwork for you and conversation too,

IV's to change, drugs to dispense, people to move,

Getting in your groove another shift to get through.

I wake up in the hospital again,

Looking out to my view, what am I going to do,

 I am stuck in the room feeling kind of blue,

Not feeling safe as even when asleep people intruded.

Here I have a question for you?

In someone's hotel would just walk into their room?

It would be kinda rude, that's true,

So what would you do?

You would knock on the door,

Give them a chance to answer before you came in,

When in the hospital patients have no choice,

You go home at the end of your shift,

But we're here till we're alright.

It's hard to feel safe in a place when your personal space is non-existent,

If you don't feel safe how can you heal?

It is where you work but its where we live,

We have no choice in being here so give us a thought,

We just want to feel safe in these hard times.

The Last two weeks

 This Infection climbing up to my liver,

Swelling the tube will this pain last forever,

Nauseous most of my time, will I be sick?

Is it the heat that makes me feel shit?

Antibiotics make me feel better,

Until something hits me hard,

Every time I have to overcome it,

Crawl my way back to normal.

Sit watching the TV anxiety screaming danger,

As I see on the internet all of that hatred,

My mind runs to my friends and those small-minded men,

Looking for an outlet for anger so offend.

Violence and streets filled with filth,

Their entire personalities spilth,

People who live small want to drag down those who don't,

Can't understand they have something they don't,

The drive and determination to dream big,

And the effort and hard work to achieve it.

Hate breeds hate it's not what I'm about,

We need to help reeducate,

 Put love back in their heart so we can be one,

Hopefully, we can recover and banish the negativity,

It's the only way our society will have some longevity.

Don't let this darkness take over your soul,

We want to advance together that's our goal,

Love each other like family,

Banding together as One.

The 13.8%

 I am sitting here battered and bruised,

I am sitting here wholeheartedly confused,

I am sitting here listening to the hate being spewed,

 I am sitting here wondering what I can do.

Do these people understand what we'd lose?

Do these people understand what they do?

Do these people understand Isolationism is bad for us too?

Do these people understand the cliff that's in view?

Whitewashing a problem solves nothing,

Hiding from reality will surely be discovered,

Why are we hate those who came to care,

I am and standing listening and pulling out my hair.

Why does it matter if they came from here or there?

Why are we so insular, why are we afraid?

What can we do to change this foul direction?

What can we do to correct or doomed course?

The '13.8 %' should have nothing but love,

They came here to care for us heavens above,

We need to reset this air of hate,

Replace it with love on this very night.